Its complicated

tough times are here and it's here to stay.

i've always been hearing that you're tired and sick to chase me back.

personally i feel that you never did try to get me back very time a argument starts.

Instead you'll just try to find the easy way out and that is to call for a split.

then i'll be the one giving in and calling you to settle our displeasures even though i always blow my top. least i tried.

you have never once tried to settle any displeasure between us.

you say you ignore me so that you wouldn't say mean stuff but looks like even when you do that, you do say mean stuff.

i was really trying zuhdi. all you could say is lets go our separate ways. it hurts.

I know i'm very temperamental, i know i get agitated at the slightest wrong doing.

i can't help it. that's how i am. blame it on the genes. that's the way i am.

i told you i'll change. i am, i am doing it slowly. i need your help but if that's your helping then i don't think i'll need it. it'll just make matter worst.

i know whatever i wrote here won't change or settle anything but what i'm trying to say is could you just let off some of that ego and try to see my point.

it's not going to work out if one party is trying her/his best to keep the relationship alive.

i really am tired zuhdi.

i was cool with you going out with your ex girlfriend.

you said you wanted to socialize, fine but from 5 till 11? thats too much zuhdi.

i really really sometime hope you'll know how i feel if i were to go out with my ex. sadly i don't have any ex.

its hard to explain. its a mixture of anxiety, with insecurities. although countless time you tell me that nothing will happen, i'm the only one you'll love. Its just a feeling that can't go away as much as i want it to.

on my side, maybe i was at wrong too. least you told me where you were but i guess that insecurity plus anxiety got the better of me. i'll apologize for that.

stuff would have been fine if you would have just accepted my forgiveness though it wasn't the way you wanted it to be.

i'm really tired zuhdi. physically and mentally. every time we argue i can't sleep.

i do hope you'll have mercy on me and do something because i do love you.